Still alive;)

I just needed break from everything. I've been feeling very overwhelmed with all of my responsibilities and caring for four little ones. Just plain drained. Hopefully, I will be back on track next week. I hope you all are doing well!

Dee~

Weigh-In Wednesday

Well, I gained 1.8 lbs. I'm okay with that. I'm happy because I was expecting more WAY more:PI'm not going to throw myself a pity party because that never does me any good. Instead, I'm moving on and rectifying my mistakes. Mostly too much snacking in between meals. I'm going to the basement to start my 2nd day of the Couch to 5K program then do my EA Active workout. I'll be back later, need to workout now since its nap time and I can focus without being interrupted;)

Dee~

Couch to 5K-Week 1/Workout 1

It wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it was going to be!!My abs are burning like fire right now though. Is this normal after running? My workout days for this program is Mon/Wed/Fri. I really can't believe that I, passionate hater of running, made it through. Here are my stats for this workout:

301 calories burned
1.92 miles
31:08 minutes

I'm not sure if that's good or bad since it was a combination of a 5 min. warm up, 60 secs of running, 90 sec. of brisk walking, then a 5 minute cool down. But I do know that I did it!!!

Dee~

Couch to 5K

Well I'm not a runner. I mean I can't stand running. But here I am, after my mommy friends have stalked my Facebook page telling me that I'm doing a 5K in April. I think i have officially gone insane. I can't believe I'm doing this. I never in my wildest dreams would have even considered doing something like this. I avoid running if at all possible. This is the one form of exercise that I dodge like a bullet. Well the 5K is scheduled for Saturday, April 24. So that gives me a little over 3 months to train. This is going to be one interesting part of my journey. I'm interested to see if I can actually pull off the training AND the 5K. But I've been told repeatedly that I can do this and that I have it in me to make it through, so here goes nothing folks. I've found a hip hop podcast for the program to keep me motivated. I will be blogging after each training session. Wish me luck!!

Dee~

Biggest Loser Season 9 Premiere Tonight!!!!

I'm so excited about Season 9 that airs tonight on NBC. The contestants go through amazing transformations, inside and out. I wonder who the game player will be. I really don't like that part of the show but what's a show without drama? I wonder if I'm the only one who plans their Tuesday around this show. I could watch it on Hulu but who wants to wait an entire week. I did this last season and it sucked being an entire week behind everyone else:/There is a daughter/father couple from Minneapolis that we'll be cheering for since I live in the Twin Cities!!

In regards to me, I'm having a super productive Tuesday. I have so much energy and I ran out of my One a Day women vitamins almost a week ago. I just got back from grocery shopping WITH A LIST and still forgot to pick them up. Go figure!! Maybe I can persuade hubby to go back to the store for me later. But since the temps have been below zero for the last couple of weeks, I doubt that'll happen:D. I don't think I'll ever get use to the winters here. Its insane that you still are required to go to work/school and wherever else you may need to be in this harsh weather. I'm hoping that I'll be able to blog more now that the kids are back in school and life is finally back to "normal".

I started doing the EA Active More Workouts, 2 weeks ago and I must tell you this is not just some fun video game to past time away with. This is intense stuff. I'm doing high intensity and my husband does the low intensity since he just started working out. I sweat just as much as I would if I did an hour on the elliptical machine. What I like most the workout is that you work your abs EVERY time. That the one part of my body I don't work out nearly as often as I should. Its really doesn't take much to get the abs sore. Leg extensions suck!!!

Well I need to put the little ones down for a much needed nap and then its workout time for this momma!!

Have a great and productive Tuesday!!

Dee~

Happy New Year!!!!!

This year has most definitely flown by for me. Nothing really stood out for me besides the fact that I've lost over 34 lbs!!!! I weighed in this morning at 144.8 which is a new low for me:)I didn't do as well as I would have liked to but over the holidays there was much temptation. I definitely stayed on track with my workouts and water intake though. I have 8.8 lbs. before reaching a "normal" BMI and an additional 7lbs before reaching my ultimate goal of 129.2. I'm almost there, I can taste it. I can do this!I've been struggling the last few weeks but I believe that I'm finally out of the rut I was in. Thank you to all of you who have supported me since I started this blog. I can't tell you how much that has helped me to get over this rough patch. I hate to cut this short but I have four kids and a hubby to entertain:)

I wish you all much success in 2010.

Dee~

Being true to myself

I want to first off say thank you to those of you who have been supporting me these last few weeks during this rough patch. I couldn't have made it this far without people like you.

(I might be doing a bit of rambling on, so bare with me.)

I've been doing a lot of contemplating, torturing myself, and just being down right angry these last few weeks. I haven't been in a good place unfortunately. I have had a few unfortunate hardships that made me just take a step back from my journey and what I'm trying to accomplish here. It has left me with being exhausted and frustrated. In regards to this weight loss journey that I have embarked on, I decided to not weigh in again until the 1/1/10. I am focusing way too much on the numbers and not the overall health benefits that come from losing weight. I feel that I'm not in the right frame of mind to get on the scale right now. I'm honestly okay with that. My only goal is to be in a "normal" weight range by 2/2/10. I started to faithfully keep track of my weight loss efforts on that date last year. I think this is reasonable and achievable. I have to keep reminding myself that this process doesn't happen overnight. There is no time limit that I have to keep. I need to do this one day at a time, one pound at a time. I've been through so much in my 30 years on this earth, that this weight loss thing can't defeat me. I won't let it. I'm better than that.

Well, I'm off to go exercise( I usually workout at night)now since the undefeated New Orleans Saints have a game tonight!!!13-0, hoping to continue the winning streak by destroying the poor Dallas Cowboys who are know for a string of bad luck during the month of December:P

Look for me to keep updating my emotional progress on my journey and the big weigh-in on the 1st of the year.

Dee~

Disappointment:(

This week has been absolutely horrible. It started when the snow came, the van had a flat, and a few days later, we had to replace the car battery. Along with those little obstacles, I thought that I was going to be receiving some life changing news. Well the good news turned out to be not so good news, I ate and ate and ate and then cried cried cried. Why did I let my emotions take over? I haven't exercised since Monday. I'm so disappointed in myself. I totally lost control. I just blew it. I don't know why I'm getting so close to my goal and then taking a billion steps back. What the hell is wrong with me??Why can't I get a grip all of a sudden??How can I call myself a role model to my children??I'm just plain angry. Its also that time of the month. Just great. Just what I need. Bloating, mood swings, and fatigue. None of which are helpful at this point. I just feel so out of whack. I honestly don't know how to pick up the pieces. I can't believe one little thing has done so much damage:/

Dee~

Goals for the week

I need to start doing this so I won't fall off as much as I have in the last few weeks. So here goes:

1.Exercise 2x per day
2. Drink at least 120 oz. of water per day
3. Go to bed before 11pm
4. Eat within my calorie range of 1400 calories
5. Use food journal daily
6. Do ab exercises during every workout

I feel that most of these goals are doable. I can't wait to see if I accomplish them all by the end of the week. Wish me luck!!

Dee~

Not beating myself up....moving on

Well if you couldn't tell by the title, I gained weight. I weighed in at 146.4, which is 1.1lbs. up from last Saturday. I'm okay with it. I know what I did wrong, so now I should concentrate on rectifying that instead of digging a deep hole for myself. I just don't think it will serve me any purpose to be angry about a number all weekend. I'm to a point where I actually don't mind looking at myself in the mirror. I'm more confident then ever. I'm GOING to step it up a notch this week. My gift to myself this Christmas is to be at a "normal" weight. I want nothing else except that. I don't think I'm going to take the weekend off from exercise. I'm so close to my goal. I just can't give up now. I don't want to be feeling like crap at the beginning of 2010. I don't want to "start over" again. Its just not acceptable. I'm better than that.

I'm going to head out and do some shopping. I'm going to look into buying a sit up bench as well. I hope you all have a great weekend. Much success at your next weigh-in;)

Dee~

So stressed!!

I love my children dearly but I think they seriously were trying to have me declared insane. If it wasn't my 3 year old daughter Ayannia peeing on the floor, it was my baby girl Saiya clinging to me like velcro. I'm so freakin' tired. Now I have to clean up the lunch mess, workout, put another load in the wash, then get everyone ready to go to my 7 yr. old son Malique's school tonight to make a Gingerbread house. My four year old Kaine is overly chatty these days. When his sister doesn't want to play, he tries to force her to play. WTF??The weather isn't helping much either. My baby girl was diagnosed with pneumonia on Tuesday(she has not been herself one bit:/)so not much outside activity is going to happen since its in the low 20s today. I need a freakin' break. I really hope this stress doesn't affect my weigh-in tomorrrow. UGH!!!!I love my children!! I love my children!! I love my children!!

Dee~

Sweet 16:)

I added 9 more pounds to my ticker, which would bring me down to 129.2. I'm only 5'2, so I want to make sure that I look healthy. Some of the recommendations I've came across on the internet, say I should be at 115. I think that's a bit much. My 7 year old is 60 lbs. lol. I'm not sure why, but when I initially changed my ticker, I frowned. It feels like I just dragged myself back a few paces. I know that's not really what I'm doing. I'm not sure if those 9lbs. will make a difference or not, but I would sure like to find out. The ultimate goal is to live a healthier lifestyle;).

Exercise Log?

I've been searching for a few days now for an online exercise tracker that can be used on my blog but I've found NOTHING! I can't believe that isn't available. I don't want to continue to using my text log because eventually it will be a mile long. I would like something that revolves and looks simple. I'm sick of looking for one!!IF you have one, PLEASE let me know. Thanks!

Dee~

Wow!!!

Weigh-in: 145.3
Weight loss: 2.9!!
Only 9.3 lbs to go:)

I just knew that after last week's weak moment, that I had totally ruined any chance of losing weight. I just wasn't giving a crap for a few days. I beat myself up really hard about it too. Well, as it turns out, exercise really does work!!! I can't believe I lost so much. I was expecting a gain or breaking even. I must have squealed for about five minutes after I weighed in lol. My husband was shocked too;)I actually LOST weight during Thanksgiving week. I didn't think that was even possible. I owe it all to my food scale. If something ever happened to it, I think I would go insane. Its definitely the key to my weight loss success. I don't think I would have gotten this far without it. I really gave it my all with my workouts though(If you look on the left and scroll down a little, you'll see what I did this week). I really hate to cut this short, but I must tend to my family and get some breakfast going. I hope you all enjoy the rest of this long weekend:)

Dee~

I'm truly blessed:)

Today, we all gave thanks for various reasons. I have so much to be grateful for.

An amazing husband and father that loves me unconditionally. He's my best friend and I adore him.

I have four beautiful healthy children that I wouldn't be able to go a day without hugging or kissing. They are my world.

I have a roof over my head and food in the pantry. We all tend to take those things for granted. People in different parts of the world can't say the same......

I have parents who have been married for 30 years and taught me the true meaning of marriage.

I have two siblings who I talk to daily. We've always been close:)

In regards to eating today, I did great!!! Having a food scale really did the trick. I ate 1529 in total today. I feel so happy about that. I prepared everything the healthy way and I even had dessert TWICE. I feel amazing and just plain happy right now. I even exercised earlier. I would never have thought that I would be working out on a holiday!!

Well I'm going to go and enjoy the remainder of the night with my hubby since the kids are asleep. I hope that everyone had a great day surrounded by family, friends, and love:)

Dee~

Sabotage

That's one word to describe what I'm doing to myself and this weight loss journey. For the last two days, I just haven't committed myself to my goals at all. Why with 12 lbs. left, I've decided to do this? Why am I not taking responsibility for my actions? Why haven't I worked out in two days? Why am I doing this???Ughhhhhhh:/ Its like I'm purposely throwing in the towel. What am I afraid of? Is it being "normal"? Is it not being able to hide under my XL winter coat that is too big for me now? I have so many questions about myself but I don't know where to find the answers that I'm looking for. I'm not certain if its the weather that's just throwing me off course(been raining and been stuck home with a sick child), but this isn't a good place to be in mentally. This just freakin' bites! I need to get a grip before this gets out of control........


Dee~

As expected......

Weight: 148.2
1.8 lbs. gained

I have no one to blame and no excuses. I fell off the wagon this week. I nibbled way too much. It is what it is. I'm not going to do wallow in self-pity all week because that won't do me any good. On the plus side, I'm not back in the 150s and I lost an inch on my waist, so those are my NSV(non-scale victories). My goal for next week is to be at 145. I really need to get a grip with my calories and continue to journal. I also want to exercise seven days this week. We'll see what actually ends up happening at my next weigh-in. If I don't challenge myself, I'll never get rid of these last 12 lbs. Well I don't have too much to write at the moment. If that changes, I'll be back;) Enjoy your weekend!!

Dee~

Perfect timing

After complaining about not having any support from my mommy friends with being accountable for our weight, I literally found a challenge hours after I blogged. It definitely must be faith. I NEED this to get these last 10lbs. gone for good. I'm in a Christmas Challenge thanks to 266:) I really have to focus. I've got a feeling that the scale won't be kind to me at tomorrow's weigh-in. I've been on a "nibble" fest all week. I've been nibbling when I make every meal. And knowing that I'm doing so, sadly I continued for the majority of the week. This just freakin' blows. I have been keeping up with exercising though, so I could be in for a surprise. Who am I kidding?? I'm just gonna expect a gain and move on. I'm not perfect. I know what I did wrong. This challenge will get me back on track!! Until tomorrow........

Dee~

Frustrating

I was just thinking about my weigh-in day. I've been weighing in on Wednesdays lately because some of my mommy friends figured they needed the motivation and accountability. Well after a month, they've dropped off like flies. I feel like I shouldn't even bother with tomorrow's weigh-in. (Last week I was the only one who bothered to even post my weight). I think I'm going to go back to a Saturday weigh-in instead. I was hoping everyone would stick it out but it didn't happen:( I've been searching for some sort of weight loss challenge but haven't came up with anything as of yet, so if you know of anything out in blog land, please leave me a comment! "See" you all on Saturday for my next round with the scale.

Dee~

A girl could get use to this!

Weight: 146.4
Pounds lost: 0.9

I haven't had the chance to really blog the last few weeks as I would have liked since life is super busy right now. Parent teacher conferences, getting some Christmas shopping done, everyday errands, and spending time with the kids is a LOT of work. But I think keeping busy also helps me on this journey. I don't have time to say "I can't do this" or "I don't feel like eating that". I'm a planner by default (its in the genes) and I beat myself up if I don't follow through with something. That's goes for every aspect of my life. I'm at the 10 lbs to go mark and I must admit I'm a tad bit afraid that its going to become even more difficult to lose weight the last few weeks. I have read that the last 10 lbs are the hardest to lose. I'm probably going to lose an additional 10 lbs. but I'll access that when I reach my goal. That amount of weight loss can make a huge difference, so we'll see. Passing by mirrors, I almost don't recognize myself if that makes any sense. I'm starting to actually "see" the hard work and dedication. This is an amazing feeling that I don't ever want to go away. In the back of my mind, I will always wonder why did I wait this long to get it together?

On another note, today as you know is Veteran's day. I don't have anyone close in my family that served our nation but I would like to say thank you to those who have and are doing so right now. God bless you!

Happy Hump Day everyone, I hope you enjoy the rest of the week;)

Dee~