Saturday, December 19, 2009

Being true to myself

I want to first off say thank you to those of you who have been supporting me these last few weeks during this rough patch. I couldn't have made it this far without people like you.

(I might be doing a bit of rambling on, so bare with me.)

I've been doing a lot of contemplating, torturing myself, and just being down right angry these last few weeks. I haven't been in a good place unfortunately. I have had a few unfortunate hardships that made me just take a step back from my journey and what I'm trying to accomplish here. It has left me with being exhausted and frustrated. In regards to this weight loss journey that I have embarked on, I decided to not weigh in again until the 1/1/10. I am focusing way too much on the numbers and not the overall health benefits that come from losing weight. I feel that I'm not in the right frame of mind to get on the scale right now. I'm honestly okay with that. My only goal is to be in a "normal" weight range by 2/2/10. I started to faithfully keep track of my weight loss efforts on that date last year. I think this is reasonable and achievable. I have to keep reminding myself that this process doesn't happen overnight. There is no time limit that I have to keep. I need to do this one day at a time, one pound at a time. I've been through so much in my 30 years on this earth, that this weight loss thing can't defeat me. I won't let it. I'm better than that.

Well, I'm off to go exercise( I usually workout at night)now since the undefeated New Orleans Saints have a game tonight!!!13-0, hoping to continue the winning streak by destroying the poor Dallas Cowboys who are know for a string of bad luck during the month of December:P

Look for me to keep updating my emotional progress on my journey and the big weigh-in on the 1st of the year.



Shelley said...

Dee, I just looked over on your sidebar and saw that you were 179 in February, when you started...and now you're 148 - you have done so well this year! I'm really happy for you and hope you can be happy for yourself. Hope things get better on the other stuff, whatever that may be. Hang in there, my friend.

Dee said...

Thanks Shelley:)I just think that my hormones have been out of whack for the last few weeks. I've finally begun to refocus on weight loss. No stopping me now. I can do this;)